R O B E R T
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L.
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S H E E L E Y,
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O F
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R A I N B O W
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P L A N T A T I O N
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B L U E S
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B I O G R A P H Y
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of Robert L. Sheeley, author of
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xxxxxI was born on March 6,
1968 to Bobby and Paulette Sheeley in Cleveland, Ohio. My parents were married when my older
sister and I were born but they were very young and they soon divorced.
xxxxxMy mother was left to
raise my sister and me on her own. She found work in healthcare and started school to become a
RN. My father remained in the shadows of my boyhood and adolescence
but he never provided financially for
my sister and me in any manner. I do not mean to imply that I am bitter or angry about his
absence, because I am not. I am simply stating the reality of my childhood. I will proclaim
that I like the essence of my person. I like the man I have evolved into. I believe that if I
truly like myself then I cannot harbor any regret or bitterness over past periods or
experiences in my life. For all of my past experiences have converged to shape the person I am
today, the person I like.
xxxxxI first realized that
I was a creative person, an artist, in the first grade. I was taking art classes at the
Cleveland Museum of Art and I won a contest for a drawing I did of the four food groups. I
remember everyone was so impressed with what seemed to be my innate creativity and talent.
From then on, art would always be my best subject in school. I took art classes from first
grade through twelfth and I always received As.
xxxxxEnglish was never my
worst subject, but it was never my best either. And I never took a creative writing course.
However, I can honestly say that I did begin my "creative writing" course in high school study
hall. By the time I reached high school I had decided I wanted to be a singer. I had always
loved music, starting with the 1970s disco craze on into the early 1980s. And in 1982, when
we moved from Shaker Heights to Geneva, Ohio I "discovered" pop music. Artists like Michael
Jackson, Culture Club, Cyndi Lauper, WHAM!, Tina Turner, and
Madonna, to name a few, were
blowing up the record charts. The 80s were a time of mega pop stars. I was caught up in the
frenzied excitement of it all. I was also popular in school, an outrageous dresser, a member
of the school thespian society, and an artistic or "artsy" kind of person. It seemed natural
that I was destined for stardom, that I was the next "big thing." So I began my creative
writing course in study hall - song writing!
xxxxxMy first song was
called "She's an Easy Prey (She'll Give You One Good Lay)". Believe me, being a gay man I
knew nothing about the subject matter then, and still don't. It was the 1980s. There were no
gay/straight alliances in high schools or Out and proud teens. So I, like most gay teens back
then, was trying to play it straight.
xxxxxI taught myself to
write songs by listening to the American Pop 40 radio program every Sunday. I studied the
intro, the verses, the bridges, and the "hooks" of pop songs trying to understand their
structures and what made them hits.
xxxxxThe first song I
wrote that I knew was recordable was called "All I Need is You". True to my instinct, I did
record it years later in 1992.
xxxxxI ended up writing
scores of song lyrics between 1986 and 1995 and I actually recorded about twenty of them.
During that time I had also moved to Hollywood, CA (and back). I sent out numerous demos,
all of which got rejected. I got a manager, a homophobic one, and performed in his local play
productions. I also took voice lesson after voice lesson trying to maximize my vocal capacity.
xxxxxIt was during my
short time living in L.A. that I found and started practicing Buddhism. I have never stopped.
I chant my mantra every day. It is a path I believe keeps me focused and able to renew myself.
xxxxxBy the mid 1990's
I was beginning to feel a desperate need for "renewal". I was becoming disillusioned with
pop culture. Don't get me wrong, I think pop culture has its place in society (to this day
I'm a Madonna worshiper) but I was growing more and more uncomfortable with my pursuit of pop
stardom. I was reading a lot of history and politics and it seemed like the last thing
humanity needed was another pop star. I threw my demo tapes and record company rejection
letters into a drawer and became an activist.
xxxxx "Politics! Yeah,
that's my calling!" I told myself. The LGBT rights movement was heating up. I felt that maybe
I could have an impact on it. Maybe I could help make a difference.
xxxxxI got involved with
local political groups. I started helping to organize. I leafleted. I demonstrated. I
wrote political commentary and I spoke at rallies and protests. I enrolled in community
college where I got all A's and B's and I networked, networked, networked!
xxxxxBy Sept. 11, 2001, my
political footing was on solid ground. I knew where I stood and what I stood for, but I was
beginning to see that I was not "thick-skinned" enough. I was a thinker, but I was also
sensitive and creative. The "artsy" kid in me, the one that had always been there, was still
there! I saw that politics left me very little, if any, room to cultivate and utilize my
artistic side. I am not hard and dogged, I am intuitive and fluid.
xxxxxTalk about a "rude
awakening"! I did not know where to turn or what to do this time. So I sank into a deep
suicidal depression and become a slut! A "safe" slut I might add. I waited tables for a living
and had one night stand after one night stand. There were some bright spots during this period, but overall it was very dark and lonely. The two suicide attempts I had had during this time can attest to that! Little did I know that "kicker" was yet to come.
xxxxxMy "dark hour", as
I call it, was when I got with my second boyfriend whom I will call "D". D was hot and sexy,
but not all there. In hindsight, I should have been looking for love from within, not from
without, but we live and we learn. Anyhow, D and I had been having unprotected sex from the
start. The physical part was great, but I could not take some of his craziness. Of course I
cannot, and do not, blame everything on him. I must have had a pretty low vibration myself for
us to have been drawn together.
xxxxxIt was during my time
with D that I found out I was HIV positive. This was my rock bottom, my "kicker"! There was no
place left to go but up. I started by getting rid of D. I told all of my family and friends,
sought treatment, did my "homework" and lost weight. The weight loss was not due to the HIV.
It was deliberate because I had become chunky. Because of my depression, I had been eating
non-stop.
xxxxxI had a strong
determination to rise above the diagnosis, like a phoenix, and somehow create value. I began
to take private voice and dance lessons and, at the age of thirty-four going on thirty-five,
started schlepping my eight year old demos again.
xxxxxWhen I finally
accepted, after more disappointment, that the music thing was not going to pan out in this
lifetime, I got a little nervous. "What am I going to try now?" I asked myself. One night I was
watching a movie in which one of the characters was an aspiring novelist. It reminded me of a
book idea I had had, and had written the first page of years earlier. An antebellum slave
master falls in love with one of his male slaves. I thought it was a "novel" idea, but, at the
time, I felt like I could never pull it off. So I shelved the one page I had written and
forgot about it. After watching the movie, the name of which I have forgotten, I decided to
revisit the idea. I found the first page I had written years earlier and, over the next few
years, added another two-hundred and forty-one pages to the story that would become
Rainbow Plantation Blues.
xxxxxDuring that few
years, I studied fiction writing and book promotion, found a typist, an editor, a grammarian,
a self-publisher, two endorsements, and built this website.
xxxxxxxxxxWith the publication of Rainbow Plantation Blues, I feel like
my creative/artsy side and my political/thinker side are finally at peace. I feel my years
of song writing and political writing reveal that I had always been a writer. Writing had
always been at the core of my endeavors and my best feature.
xxxxxPlease, don't take
my word for it. You be the judge! If you have not already read Rainbow Plantation Blues,
buy a copy today! Read it for yourself! You may contact me, via this website, if you have any
questions or comments. Thanks for your time and interest. Hope to hear from you soon!
Robert L. Sheeley
Madison, Wisconsin
January, 2008
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